Bad mom? I ate cheeseburgers instead of practicing yoga in the first trimester

Before I became pregnant, I had this fantasy that I would be this glowing pregnant yogi, sipping on green organic juices, practicing yoga daily and connecting with the child developing inside me.

Enter reality.

The first trimester didn’t feel so magical.

I felt nauseous. All. The. Time. I was exhausted. And I was extremely picky about food and smells.

To make matters worse, I developed a painful ovarian cyst, and had a strange issue due to my uterus being retroverted that meant I was in bed for a week. It was a rough three months. 

Organic juices? No. Give me pizza and ice cream. My yoga mat? The thought of getting on it made me want to vomit. The most movement I could handle was the occasional walk in the sunshine, which seemed to help ease my symptoms.

I’m very conscious of fitness and nutrition, so I was concerned.

I thought maybe something was wrong with me. I was worried that I’d spend my entire pregnancy eating garbage and being inactive. And what would that mean for my baby? But then I started reading mom forums and realized that it’s not just me. This is a thing.

I unloaded the guilt I’d been carrying around and trusted that it would get better.

I continued to eat pizza, cheeseburgers and whatever food I could stomach. I spent as much time in bed as I could. I walked outside when I felt up to it — not for exercise but to take some fresh-air medicine to ease my queasy stomach. And my yoga mat remained rolled up in the corner, neglected.

This body isn’t just mine anymore. And more than ever before, I’m learning to trust what it wants — not what the control freak in me thinks it needs. During the first trimester, it needed takeout food and rest. 

9 weeks pregnant, from my hotel room on a work trip. I threw up the night before and then slept for about 10 hours. I think I walked for 10 minutes that morning.

Now that I'm in the second trimester, I feel completely different.

The nausea is gone. I've regained energy. I've been enjoying my yoga practice again. And I've even started back on my gym routine. 

I've replaced cheeseburgers with salads and my appetite is craving wholesome foods.

13 weeks pregnant before my first day back at the gym. I spent a total of maybe 30 minutes there that evening. I definitely had to ease back in!

I'm sharing this because there's a lot online about "how to be fit/healthy during your pregnancy" ... but those articles fail to point out how impossible that can feel.

I realize that every woman is different, every pregnancy is different and my experience is not universal. But I know it's fairly common. So if you found this post because you're struggling to stay healthy in your first trimester — girl, there's nothing wrong with you. And if you're like me, you'll get to feeling better soon (though probably not as soon as you'd like ... but you've got this).  

I am a yoga instructor who values health and fitness, and I didn't practice yoga, work out or eat anything nutritious for the first three months of this pregnancy. And that's OK.

The takeaway: Trust and honor your body, even when that means going against everything the health industry says to do. (Says me — the expert on my body, not on all bodies.)

Yogi mommas, did you practice during your first trimester?